


The Day I Lost My Light

by Ethiopia



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternative Universe – Relationship, Angst, Bokuaka - Freeform, Completed, Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, I’m sorry I wrote this, KuroKen - Freeform, M/M, Reincarnation, Terminal Illnesses, haikyuu!! - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:07:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28404468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ethiopia/pseuds/Ethiopia
Summary: When you are trapped in darkness, someone suddenly comes into your life and gives you a light to come out of the dark past that has always haunted you.But, when the light that led you to rise from the darkness disappears, can you continue to walk without him?
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou/Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 4
Kudos: 8





	The Day I Lost My Light

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I hope you enjoyed the story !! Thank you for reading this story, enjoy !!
> 
> Please tell me what you think of this story in the comments as I want to know what you think. And if you like the story, don't forget to leave a compliment :)
> 
> Have a nice day!

The sound of the alarm woke a boy with emerald eyes from his dream. “It’s morning? I have to hurry.” He also got up from his bed and took a shower. After he finished, he put on a uniform, a scarf and went to school.

While on the way, he saw a boy the same age as him. Maybe a year older than him was sitting in the middle of the road with his head down. He wears the same school uniform as Akaashi. Since no one cared, Akaashi walked over to him and stretched out his hand to him.

“Hey, are you okay?” The boy who was summoned turned his head. Her golden eyes met Akaashi’s emerald eyes. He stood up then looked at Akaashi. “Oh? Hey! Hey! Hey! I am fine!” He spoke—shouted with a big smile.

_‘His smile looks like the sun. Bright and full of enthusiasm.’ thought Akaashi._

Akaashi only nodded briefly then left the person. “Hey! Wait for me! What’s your name? I’m Bokuto Koutarou. Grade 3.” He hugged Akaashi after catching up with him. “Akaashi. Akaashi Keiji. Grade 2.”

After that Bokuto talked about things that weren’t even important to discuss. Akaashi didn’t intend to answer. He just listened.

_‘How can he act like this to the person he just met? You are a strange senior.’ thought Akaashi._

During recess, Akaashi was in the school garden alone. His eyes were busy looking at the blue sky. He could faintly hear someone’s footsteps walking towards him. But Akaashi ignored him and still looked up at the sky. “Hey! Hey! Hey! Aghasheee!!!”

Akaashi turned his head and saw Bokuto coming with two _yakisoba_ buns, he smiled broadly. “Bokuto-san, my name is Akaashi. Not Aghasheee.” Bokuto just laughed. He also gave one of his _yakisoba_ buns to Akaashi. “No, thank you.” Even though Akaashi refused, Bokuto still gave it to Akaashi and sat beside him. “Uhm, thanks.” Bokuto just nodded with a big smile again.

“What are you doing? Looking at the sky?” Akaashi nodded. According to Akaashi, the sky is very beautiful. Especially the light blue color which is dominated by white from the clouds. “Yes, they are very beautiful.”

“You too.” Akaashi tilted his head while staring at Bokuto in confusion. “Your eyes are also beautiful like the sky. The color of your emerald eyes makes me want to keep seeing them. Maybe until I can see him as long as possible from now on, haha.” Akaashi fell silent. Then smiled faintly. “Look as long as you can see it, Bokuto-san.”

Even though it’s the first time meeting him, Akaashi feels comfortable around Bokuto. Akaashi wanted to stay close to him. Maybe until Bokuto graduates later. Likewise with Bokuto. He is very comfortable around Akaashi.

🌟🌟🌟

After school, Akaashi walks to the gym and is surprised to see Bokuto there too. “Bokuto-san?” Bokuto turned his head and went straight to Akaashi who had just arrived. “Aghasheee! Do you also play volleyball? I’m an ace. What is your position?” ask Bokuto. “Setter, Bokuto-san."

“Then give me your best toss! I want to try it with you!” Akaashi just said yes. Akaashi started passing the ball towards Bokuto. At the same time Bokuto jumped and hit the ball and produced a spike cross. Akaashi didn’t think it would work. “That’s the perfect toss! I love your toss. From now on, give all your best toss!” Bokuto said while smiling broadly. Akaashi just nodded. “Of course, Bokuto-san.”

🌟🌟🌟

It was already six in the afternoon, Akaashi hurried home. He stopped by the supermarket to buy _onigiri_ and instant _ramen_. When he got home, Akaashi took a shower and rested himself in the room.

Akaashi lives alone at home. Akaashi’s parents had worked outside the city for a long time and never came home. Once a month, Akaashi’s parents send money for Akaashi’s school fees. But, that wasn’t what Akaashi wanted, he just wanted his parents to be by his side. Spend time together like any other family.

Even so, Akaashi never complained. Akaashi loved his parents very much. Every day he always prayed that his parents would be well. Because he didn’t want to bother his parents. Every weekend, Akaashi took the time to work part-time at a cafe near his house.

Akaashi took a photo near his study table. He looks at the photo. Where in the photo are his parents and little Akaashi who are smiling happily. “They are precious people to me. God, please take care of them.”

🌟🌟🌟

The next day, Akaashi left for school as usual. While on the way, Akaashi and Bokuto accidentally met on the bus. “Good morning, Aghasheee!” Akaashi nodded slowly. Seeing that the seat beside Akaashi is empty, Bokuto immediately sat beside Akaashi and made Akaashi a little flinched.

“Today is early September right? What are some fun activities to do? Akaashi, what are you going to do?” Akaashi stares at the city view from the bus window and then answers Bokuto’s question. “I don’t know either, Bokuto-san. Maybe I’ll study at home and work part time this weekend.”

“I see. Hey Akaashi, let’s exchange phone numbers.” Akaashi fell silent. He thought for a moment then nodded. Finally they exchanged phone numbers.

🌟🌟🌟

After school, Akaashi cleaned the house and cooked food. Hearing his phone ring, Akaashi paused his activities for a moment and then saw who sent the message.

**[Bokuto Koutarou]**

“Aghasheee! It’s me Bokuto."

**[Akaashi Keiji]**

“Yes, Bokuto-san.”

After finishing texting, Akaashi continued his activities. A few minutes later, the phone kept ringing. Akaashi was forced to see it. There were three missed calls. And this is the fourth time. Since it was an unfamiliar number, Akaashi tried to pick up the phone.

“Excuse me, is this with Akaashi Keiji-san?”

"Yes. Who is it with?”

“I’m from the hospital, I want to convey that your parents died in a car accident in _Tokyo_. And now their bodies have been evacuated in hospital xxx. I hope you come here soon. Thank you.”

“W-what?! Dad and mom died? I-this can’t be true? I will have to see it for myself at the hospital soon." After finishing changing clothes, Akaashi immediately went to the hospital. The hospital that had called, explained again to Akaashi then escorted Akaashi to the morgue.

Akaashi’s heart skipped a beat as the nurse opened the cloth covering the corpse of his parents. Tears started rolling down Akaashi’s face. He hugged his parents’ two lifeless bodies while crying. “Dad! Mom! Don’t leave me !!!”

🌟🌟🌟

The funeral will take place this morning at eight in the morning. All of Akaashi’s friends came. Including Bokuto who had been beside Akaashi earlier. He tried to calm Akaashi who had been unable to stop crying. Bokuto who saw him couldn’t bear it. He felt sorry for Akaashi. “Akaashi, don’t cry all the time. I know it’s hard. But I will always be beside you.” Akaashi just nodded and wiped his tears.

After finishing home from the funeral, Akaashi was at home accompanied by Bokuto. He also called some of his friends, namely Kuroo Tersuro and Kenma Kozume. The four of them stay at Akaashi’s house and spend the whole night playing games.

🌟🌟🌟

Incidentally, today is school off. Akaashi and Bokuto spent their time walking in the park. Akaashi stared at the sky slowly turning into the night sky. One by one the stars began to appear. Without realizing it, Akaashi fell asleep on the grass in the park. Bokuto who saw Akaashi sleeping smiled as he gently stroked Akaashi’s black hair.

🌟🌟🌟

_“I’m scared! Anyone please help me!”_

_A_ _kaashi looked around, dark. Akaashi couldn’t see anything. There he could only see darkness. Akaashi cowered in fear. She screamed for help. But no one helped him._

_“Akaashi, don’t be afraid. I’m here.”_

_Hearing the voice of someone familiar to him, Akaashi turned his head towards the voice and saw Bokuto smiling broadly at him. Akaashi ran towards him. But the more he runs, the farther Bokuto is from himself._

_No matter how fast Akaashi ran, Bokuto slowly began to disappear from before him. Before Bokuto disappeared, Bokuto said something to Akaashi._

_“Akaashi, let’s go to the summer festival and see fireworks together.”_

_After saying that sentence Bokuto cried with a smile at Akaashi. Before Akaashi could say anything, Bokuto immediately disappeared._

🌟🌟🌟

“Bokuto-san!!!”

Bokuto who had been staring at the sky suddenly flinched at Akaashi’s scream. “Eh? Akaashi? Are you a nightmare?” Akaashi’s breath was panting. Not forgetting the cold sweat that wet his face. With trembling hands, Akaashi held Bokuto’s hand. “B-bokuto-san, y-you’re still here right? You’re not leaving me right?”

Bokuto gently stroked Akaashi’s hair. “I’ve been beside you. Then ... who wants to leave you, Akaashi? Calm down, I will always be beside you.” Akaashi started crying while hugging Bokuto. Bokuto was still confused by Akaashi’s sudden attitude. But she hugged Akaashi back. “Are you better? I’ll take you home. Anyway, I’ll stay at your house again, Akaashi.” Akaashi just nodded.

🌟🌟🌟

In early October, Bokuto rarely attended school and practiced volleyball. Even often skipping class. Akaashi starts to worry about Bokuto’s situation. Even when Akaashi texted Bokuto, he never replied. Akaashi also had time to ask Bokuto’s friends, but no one knew. There were also times when Akaashi went to Bokuto’s house, but he wasn’t home. This continued until the end of November.

In early December, Bokuto started school again. But there is something different with him after rarely attending school these few months. Today Bokuto and Akaashi is sitting in the school garden as usual. Akaashi noticed that Bokuto’s body was a little thin. Even her cheekbones were visible.

“Bokuto-san, I think your body is a little thin after rarely attending school these few months. Where have you been all this time? What happened to you? Then why didn’t you reply to my message?” Bokuto only smiled slightly.

“Hey! Hey! Hey! Aghasheee! Why do you think so? I always eat three meals a day like a normal person. In fact, I often increase my portion of food. I recently went to my grandmother’s house. He’s sick and no one is looking after him. And sorry I didn’t reply to your message, because lately I rarely hold my cellphone.” Akaashi nodded in understanding. They sit in the garden while enjoying the view of the falling snow.

🌟🌟🌟

Today is December fifth, to coincide with Akaashi’s seventeenth birthday. He intends to celebrate with Bokuto today. Yesterday he told Bokuto to meet up at the park near Akaashi’s house. When he arrived at the park, Akaashi didn’t see Bokuto. He had been waiting for over an hour. But Bokuto didn’t come. Even when Akaashi messaged him, Bokuto didn’t reply.

_‘Did Bokuto-san forget my birthday?’ thought Akaashi._

Akaashi decided to go home. When he arrived home, he saw the door to his house was open and the lights in the house were turned off. Even though before going to the park earlier, Akaashi was sure he had turned on the light and locked the door. Hesitating, Akaashi entered his house and turned on the light.

“Happy birthday Akaashi Keiji!!!”

Akaashi is surprised to see that his house has been decorated with birthday balloons and ribbons. He saw Bokuto holding a birthday bread with the number seventeen on it and some strawberries and chocolate as decorations. There are also Kuroo and Kenma. Akaashi walked over to Bokuto, Kuroo, and Kenma.

“I thought you forgot this special day.” Akaashi wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes and smiled. “Of course I haven’t forgotten. I didn’t come to the park to prepare all this. I also invited Kuroo and Kenma. Incidentally they also want to, so we prepare it together.”

“Let’s make a wish then blow out the candle, Akaashi.” Akaashi nodded. He also made a small wish on his special day today.

_‘Hopefully I don’t lose the people I care about. Especially Bokuto. I really love him. God, I hope he will always be with you and never leave me.’_

After that Akaashi started blowing out the candles. Bokuto and Kuroo shouted happily. Meanwhile, Kenma and Akaashi just smiled.

The four of them spent time together until late at night at Akaashi’s house while eating the cake Bokuto bought. After they finished eating the cake, Bokuto, Kuroo, and Kenma gave gifts to Akaashi. Akaashi opened them one by one.

When opening a gift from Bokuto, there is a red scarf in it. Akaashi wore it and thanked Bokuto. “This is a beautiful scarf. Thank you, Bokuto-san.” Bokuto immediately smiled broadly. Then Akaashi opened the gifts from Kuroo and Kenma. They gave gifts of a set of winter clothes and school stationery.

After that, Kuroo, Kenma, and Bokuto said goodbye because it was late at night and couldn’t stay overnight.

🌟🌟🌟

“Hey! Akaashi! I have a question for you. One day, when the person you care about disappears, will you be sad or will you continue to step up for him?” Akaashi was a little surprised at the question just now. “If he tells me to go ahead, I will do it for him. Even though it’s hard. Why are you suddenly asking questions like that, Bokuto-san?” Bokuto just shook his head and smiled. “I just want to know what other people think.”

Akaashi nodded and lay down beside Bokuto. “Bokuto-san, the night sky is so beautiful, right? Do you think, among the thousands of stars in the galaxy, is there one that is the brighter than the others?” Bokuto smiled at Akaashi then pointed at Akaashi. Akaashi was silent in confusion. “There is. He is the brightest star in my life. Since meeting him, I feel my life has become meaningful. That star is you, Akaashi Keiji. I love you.”

Akaashi fell silent with a shocked expression on his face. He smiled faintly as he said, “I love you too, Bokuto-san.”

🌟🌟🌟

Everything has been going smoothly ever since Akaashi and Bokuto shared their feelings. But one day bad things happen to Bokuto when he is traveling together. Bokuto suddenly has a nosebleed and passes out in the garden. A panicked Akaashi immediately takes Bokuto to the hospital.

After waiting for more than an hour, the doctor came out of Bokuto’s ward and approached Akaashi. “Bokuto just got tired, he has to be treated here for a few days. You can meet him now. Akaashi nodded and then went to meet Bokuto.

“Bokuto-san!”

Bokuto turned his head with a faint smile. “Yo! Aghasheee! Sorry for making you worry.” Akaashi sat on the chair near Bokuto’s bed, holding his hand.

He looked at Bokuto’s hands that were getting thinner lately. When Akaashi thought Bokuto’s body was getting thinner at that time, Bokuto no longer lifted his hair. He let his hair loose over his forehead. Akaashi didn’t blame Bokuto’s hair appearance, he just thought Bokuto might want to change his hairstyle.

Akaashi’s reverie shattered when Bokuto gently summoned him. “Hey, Akaashi, I have something important to tell you. Can we talk about it in the hospital garden? I’m not comfortable talking about it here.” Akaashi just said yes and then took Bokuto to the hospital garden in a wheelchair. After Akaashi asked the doctor’s permission, they went to the park.

🌟🌟🌟

They sat in the garden enjoying the cool April spring breeze. Akaashi who saw Bokuto was a little cold, he put his scarf around Bokuto’s neck while waiting for him to speak.

“Hey, Akaashi, I hid this thing before I met you. I have had brain cancer since July. According to the doctor, the rest of my life is only one year. I often don’t go to school because I have to undergo medication and therapy here. You know, since December, my hair started falling out little by little. That’s why I often wear a hat to cover it. I also often feel dizzy when I do strenuous activities. That’s why I don’t play volleyball anymore. Even after graduating, I still want to play volleyball. But it looks like it’s just wishful thinking, haha.”

Akaashi clenched his fists and then grabbed Bokuto’s shoulder. “Not! I’m sure you can still recover and can continue your dream, Bokuto-san! You can’t give up! If that happens, I won’t forgive you!” Akaashi said that while crying. Bokuto’s mouth opens slightly and then his lips form a broad smile.

"No, Akaashi, I have only two months left. My brain cancer is in the last stage. Sorry I just told you now.” Bokuto lowered his head. He couldn’t bear to look at Akaashi’s sad face.

“Why … why are everyone I care about always being taken from me?! Why?! Am I not entitled to live with the people I care about ?! I don’t want to lost again. It hurts!” Tears rolled down Akaashi’s face. He cried in front of Bokuto.

"Because God hasn’t given you happiness, Akaashi.”

Akaashi could only cry in Bokuto’s arms. After feeling a little calm, Akaashi brought Bokuto back to his ward. Akaashi intends to stay over to accompany Bokuto.

Akaashi fell asleep beside Bokuto’s bed due to exhaustion after crying for a long time. Bokuto is still awake. He stroked Akaashi’s hair gently and said, “One day ... one day you will have happiness. I promise you, Akaashi.”

🌟🌟🌟

One month passed quickly. This is mid-May. Bokuto is no longer in school. He spent his time undergoing treatment in the hospital. Every time he came home from school, Akaashi always visited Bokuto. Sometimes Kuroo and Kenma also come to visit, although not as often as Akaashi.

A few days ago, Bokuto’s condition got worse. She couldn’t walk and her hair fell out every day. His body was thin and his skin was pale. Bokuto could only lie on his bed. Seeing Bokuto’s condition made Akaashi want to cry. But she tries to keep smiling so that Bokuto doesn’t worry.

“Hi, Bokuto-san. What did you do when I was at school?" Bokuto smiled a little, “I saw the scenery in the window while reading a book. Is your school going well, Akaashi?" Akaashi nodded. “Yes, running smoothly as usual.”

“Akaashi, let’s go to the summer festival and see fireworks together.”

Instantly Akaashi remembered the dream he dreamed of when he was with Bokuto in the park. At that time, Bokuto took him to the summer festival while watching fireworks. And Akaashi also saw Bokuto who disappeared from before him.

“Of course, Bokuto-san.” Bokuto just smiled.

🌟🌟🌟

At night, right at the end of May, Akaashi accompanied Bokuto to look at the night sky full of stars from his ward window. For some reason Akaashi felt that Bokuto’s condition was getting worse every day. “Akaashi, please accompany me to sleep tonight. I want to sleep with you.” Akaashi nodded. “I can’t refuse your request, Bokuto-san.”

That night, Akaashi slept with Bokuto. Their hands clasped each other. They fell asleep in their own beautiful dreams. Without Akaashi noticing, Bokuto fell asleep with a clear smile on his face.

“Goodbye, Akaashi.”

The next day, Akaashi woke up and saw a sleeping Bokuto with a smile on his face. Akaashi also smiled faintly. Since the clock shows nine o’clock in the morning, Akaashi wakes up Bokuto. But there was no response. Bad thoughts began to fill Akaashi. Akaashi checks Bokuto’s pulse and heart rate. But there is no sign of life there. The heart monitor also shows a straight line in red. Instantly Akaashi’s heart broke to pieces. He felt that what was most precious to him was instantly snatched away from him. He didn’t expect that Bokuto would leave him one month early.

“Not ...”

“No ... this can’t be right?”

“Bokuto-san!!!”

🌟🌟🌟

Akaashi calls the doctor to check on Bokuto’s condition. And the doctor said that Bokuto was dead. Akaashi could only cry beside Bokuto’s body. Kuroo and Kenma also came when they heard that Bokuto was dead. Bokuto was immediately buried in a public cemetery near his house.

After the funeral was over, Kuroo and Kenma still accompanied Akaashi at Bokuto’s grave. “I didn’t expect Bokuto to leave us this soon. Akaashi, here’s something from Bokuto before he died. He left this to me when I visited him. I don’t know when he wrote it. But he wants me to give this to you. Please accept it. Contact us if you have a problem. We will help you."

Akaashi received the letter from Kuroo. Then Kuroo and Kenma immediately left the cemetery and left Akaashi alone at the funeral. Akaashi stared at Bokuto’s grave. Her tears were flowing again.

“Bokuto-san, to me, you are like the sun. You always give a smile as bright as the sun. Your light always leads me to continue to rise from the darkness that always haunts me. But, what should I do when I can’t see your light anymore? Tell me, Bokuto-san. Since you left, the darkness started haunting me again.”

The breeze gently blew Akaashi’s hair. He wiped his tears and then stood up and said, “Thank you for coming to my life even if it’s only for a moment. You are very valuable in my life. I hope you are fine where you are, Bokuto-san.” Akaashi left the cemetery and then returned home.

Now, Akaashi couldn’t see smile as bright as the sun anymore.

🌟🌟🌟

At home, Akaashi stared at the letter from Bokuto. He opened the letter and began to read it.

_To Akaashi,_

_Hi Akaashi, sorry I couldn’t keep my promise to go to the summer festival with you. But I hope you will keep our promises even without me. Akaashi, don’t be sad for too long, keep going even though the darkness sometimes haunts you. You don’t need to be afraid, I’m always with you. Right in your heart. Thank you for spending time with me. You make the rest of my life more meaningful._

_‘You know Akaashi, someone better is coming. I promise you.’_

_Akaashi, this is important, you should know that I really love you. Even though we can’t be together anymore, don’t ever forget me! Whatever happens, be happy, Akaashi!_

_-Bokuto Koutarou_

🌟🌟🌟

Two weeks after Bokuto died, a smile never appeared on Akaashi’s face again. Kuroo and Kenma often visited Akaashi’s house and took him out for a walk. Little by little Akaashi started to let Bokuto go and started doing his usual activities.

As the promise Akaashi made with Bokuto, tonight he’s going to the summer festival. Akaashi bought sweet arum and apple candy. He sat by the river alone watching the fireworks.

“I’ve kept our promise, Bokuto-san. To be honest it would have been more fun if you were around. But you went first.” Akaashi smiled wistfully while looking up at the sky which was filled with fireworks. “Beautiful but painful. What are you doing right now, Bokuto-san? Can you see me from there?” Akaashi asked while looking up at the sky. Hope that Bokuto can hear it even if it’s impossible.

While eating the apple candy he bought earlier, someone suddenly approached Akaashi. “Hey! Are you alone? Can I sit with you?” Akaashi turned his head and was shocked to see someone very familiar in his eyes. “B-bokuto-san?!”

He smiled brightly. “Eh? Do you know my name? Have we met?” Akaashi walked over to him. “That is not important. I ... I’m so happy to see you again. I’m sure you never left me.” Akaashi hugged Bokuto while crying. Bokuto himself was just confused.

“Then, let’s get acquainted once again. My name is Koutarou. Bokuto Koutarou.”

“My name is Keiji. Akaashi Keiji. Welcome back, Koutarou.”

-END-

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I am happy if you like the story. I'm also happy to read your comments. Because your comments can be my passion for making better fic.
> 
> This fic is only one chapter. Maybe if there is free time, I will make another fic. See you in the next fic !!
> 
> Have a nice day!!


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